Danny Dyer and daughter Dani attempt to revive a struggling Kent holiday park in a lively new Sky series inspired by Clarkson’s Farm.
Midway through the opening episode of The Dyers’ Caravan Park, their TV mission to rescue a holiday park just down the M20 from their old East End manor, Danny Dyer and his daughter Dani were busy picking out puns for a new billboard advert.
Despite the open goal provided by the murky weather, they wisely steered away from any plays on words involving their surname.
Instead, they had some fun with the holiday park’s name, Nutts Farm.
To be honest, given their dream was to turn around the fortunes of a fading holiday camp that was losing £150,000 in revenue every year from vacant caravan pitches alone, I was surprised they didn’t just go for something like “Which NumbNutts thought this was a good idea?”
In the end, the Dyer duo went for “It’s the Nutts” and “You’d be Nutts to miss out”, which seemed more an open invitation to the Isle of Sheppey’s vandals and graffiti artists to pop along with their spray cans and add some seaside humour.
I guess we’ll have to wait and see how that one turns out. In the meantime, I should report that I thought I was actually going Nutts as I watched this opening episode.
There were so many loud bleeps and beeps during it, I kept having to go downstairs to check I hadn’t left my fridge door open.
Then I worked out that, for some unknown reason, Sky had sent me the pre-watershed edit.
I’d love to say that this made the programme almost unwatchable, but having been exposed to plenty of Danny Dyer’s work over the years, it was fairly easy for me to guess exactly what he was saying.
Plus, in what had already been a controversial week for the TV industry, I guess it was nice to see that at least one British broadcaster’s bleep machine was still working properly.
It probably won’t surprise you to learn that this isn’t the first time Danny and Dani have been thrown together onscreen. However, if the opening episode was anything to go by, it might end up being the first time they’ve worked together on something that actually works.
It’s from the people who brought you Clarkson’s Farm, and although it doesn’t quite have the instant and broad appeal of its award-winning predecessor, it’s a much more engaging proposition than some of Jeremy’s other imitators. (Hi, Gordon Ramsay).
Of course, your level of enjoyment may depend on how much of Danny’s “lovable Cockney geezer” routine you can stomach in one sitting.
On that score, I was in a particularly receptive mood, partly thanks to his recent and brilliant comedy work in Sky’s Mr Bigstuff and Disney’s splendid adaptation of Jilly Cooper’s Rivals.
It also helps that Dani, who appears to have inherited her dad’s comic timing (although, thankfully, not his dress sense), is on hand to regularly prick his ego.
Sticking to the Clarkson’s Farm blueprint, The Dyers’ Caravan Park also provides the star name with a cast of likeable locals to bounce off and/or butt heads with.
It’s too early to say whether it will unearth its own Kaleb, Gerald or Charlie, but there are certainly plenty of “characters” hanging around that holiday park — as became apparent when Danny called a Town Hall meeting and one of the first submissions from the floor was “People need to stop s**tting in the swimming pool.” (Book now, folks!)
The one thing Danny’s venture does not appear to share with Clarkson’s is a sense of personal jeopardy.
The one thing Danny’s venture does not appear to share with Clarkson’s is a sense of personal jeopardy.
He says he has “invested” in Priory Hill & Nutts Farm Holiday Park and that it’s his “biggest gamble yet”, but the finer details appear a little sketchy.
I was also a little unsure about Danny’s claim that he wants to save the Great British holiday and that “these places are dying out.”
All the holiday parks similar to this one that we’ve taken our kids to in recent summers have been packed out, and according to this programme’s accompanying notes, it is part of a £7bn industry.
That’s a minor quibble, though. There was no doubting the fact that this particular holiday park was in need of a lift.
Leysdown-on-Sea itself may be just across the water from Whitstable, but it’s a million miles away from where its feted neighbour is in terms of being a tourist hotspot.
Whether the Dyers’ showbiz sparkle can help revive its fortunes remains to be seen, although their arrival certainly brought some A-list excitement to the area.
“We don’t see many celebs down here,” explained the holiday park’s owner Jimi, before adding irresistible weight to that claim with the words “I saw Barry from EastEnders in town a couple of times.”
Cheers, Jim. Best not put that on the billboard, eh?
