Jeremy Clarkson shares devastating update on Diddly Squat Farm with candid admission: ‘Won’t make money’
Jeremy Clarkson has confessed to feeling “a little embarrassed” about a major farming event taking place as he made a devastating confession about Diddly Squat Farm.
The 66-year-old television presenter revealed that his farm will host Cereals in June, a prestigious two-day gathering attracting agricultural professionals from across Britain, before admitting Diddly Squat was facing financial struggle.
Writing in his Sunday Times column, Clarkson said: “I’m very proud that we’ve been selected to host this prestigious event, but also a little embarrassed, because 30,000 farmers will be talking nonstop about farming on a farm where not much actual farming is going on.”
He added: “We know for a fact we won’t make money on wheat and barley. And we’re still closed down with TB.”
The former Top Gear host disclosed that his agricultural operation has effectively ground to a halt, with financial pressures making crop cultivation impossible.
Mr Clarkson explained that his land agent, known as Cheerful Charlie, counselled him against sowing spring barley and durum wheat in his fields this season.
The advice came with a stark warning: regardless of perfect weather or flawless execution, financial losses were inevitable.
“Last month, when I would normally be out in the fields planting the spring barley and the durum wheat, Cheerful Charlie, my land agent and all-round font of wisdom, told me that this year there’s absolutely no point, because even if the weather is perfect and I make no mistakes, we are guaranteed to lose money. It is a mathematical certainty,” Mr Clarkson wrote.
The presenter noted that last year’s prolonged hot summer produced the second worst harvest in living memory, with yields falling by up to 40 per cent.
Mr Clarkson had anticipated that reduced supply would drive prices upward.
However, the reality proved quite different. While northern Europe suffered poor yields, the rest of the world enjoyed abundant harvests, flooding global markets with grain and pushing prices to extremely low levels.
“It turns out, however, that only northern Europe had a bad harvest last year. For the rest of the world it was bountiful, so as a result the market is drowning in grain, and as a result the price is extremely low,” he explained.
The combination of depressed commodity prices and Britain’s elevated costs for energy, labour and taxation has rendered wheat cultivation economically unviable.
“So if I grew wheat this year, in the UK, where energy, labour costs and taxes are extremely high, I’d be screwed,” Mr Clarkson added.
Confronted with 1,000 acres of land rendered effectively useless, Mr Clarkson opted for an unconventional solution: hiring a 13-tonne digger.
The presenter acknowledged that combining heavy machinery with idle time represents “the most dangerous combination in the world” for a man.
“Ordinarily a man will look at a big job and think, that looks like it requires too much effort so I shall go to the pub instead. But when you’re in a digger, no job is too big,” he quipped.
Mr Clarkson recounted excavating a pond and constructing a dam before tearing out a hedge after lunch.
The fifth series of Clarkson’s Farm premieres on Amazon Prime on 3 June, split into three parts.
The show has previously documented challenges including a Bovine TB outbreak and planning disputes
